It's been a long time...

It has been a minute since I have got on my lap top and blogged.
Truth be told, I thought I broke my laptop somehow and was too lazy to take it to the store to get it fixed. I randomly picked it up today and it turned on. Needed to be wiped completely, but hey, it works.
I last blogged when I first found out I was pregnant. I now have a healthy, active, vivacious, crazy, two-toothed 9 month old.
My life has been forever changed. And in the greatest way possible.

As a little girl playing house in my garage with my neighborhood "boyfriend", I always imagined what kind of mother I would be. Would I be good at it? How hard could it be to take care of a child? I mean, I did a really good job with my Baby Born doll. And I have to say, now that motherhood is here, I think am doing more than ok. I am not just saying that because I need the ego boost. I am truly happy to say that thus far the amount of pride I take in being a mother shows. My son is loved, so loved. I know he knows it. He lights up when he sees me or his father.

I started writing him letters shortly after he was born. My post delivery experience was a near death experience and it was truly terrifying. I watched as my husband came in and out of my hospital room, with tears in his eyes, and my fresh 4-5 day old son cradled gently in his arms and the thought never left my mind that I may never get to raise this sweet little boy. That my husband may have to do it alone. Once I mentally recovered from the ordeal I decided I needed to write my sweet JR and try my hardest to write him often. Should I ever be called to Heaven before I am ready to go, before my son is old enough to understand, I wanted to leave behind letters from his Mama. Letters he could read when he was sad, missing me, or just needing to be reminded just how much I love him. And God willing, should I live on this world until I am old and grey, it will be a wonderful gift to give to him when he is older. Something he can read back on and understand just how deep a love is from a parent for their child.

Being a mother is by far one of the best titles I have (along with being a wife) and I am so excited to watch this little guy grow. Excited to watch him imagine his future, just as I did as that little girl playing house in the garage.